ALIVE 

"Home is wherever we are if there's love here too"

People definitely looked at me today and thought "Why the heck is she so happy on a thursday afternoon getting soaked by the rain walking through a thunderstorm". The answer is because with every rain drop I felt, with every thunder that raddled, every crack I tripped over (then laughed at myself for tripping), every tear I felt fall down my face - just made me realize how alive I truly am. As corny as that sounds, that is exactly what I was thinking as I was walking home from the journalism school in the rain. (And by the way, I was the only one bundled up because apparently people here don't think rain is a good enough reason to be wearing warm clothing, which just gave them even more of a reason to look at me strange).

Even with a soaked beanie and drenched hair, I realized I just need to smile. So that's exactly what I did. Through the pit in my stomach I feel from missing home - my family, friends, the beach, the familiarities - through the stress I have to follow my dreams in a way that will make me successful, through the hole in my heart & tear in my eye from the feeling of a missing puzzle piece, through the pain from the last rain drop that hit me in the eye - I smiled. I got some weird looks but I didn't care, that actually just made it better.

So walking down 16th street in the storm, I bobbed my head and snapped my fingers to the new Jack Johnson album, I sang, I danced, I laughed, I smiled, I cried. People seriously thought I was insane. But eventually those people vanished, and all that mattered was that I am alive. 

I have learned that happiness depends soley upon you. You determine whether or not you are smiling in this moment of life. You decide how you are going to take the circumstances you are given. So...why not smile? 

GAME DAY

        I have been hearing "there is nothing like a Husker game" for so long now that the anticipation was getting unbearable. Finally I attended my first Big Red football game three weeks ago. 

Just walking into the stadium you could feel the sense of family coming from the fans simply because you had the common thought in wearing red. Let me back up a few hours to the tailgate. I walked to "the bottoms" (little, run down houses that are perfect for college-kid parties) with a sophomore from my sorority. Did I mention it was 100 degree with 60% humidity? Ya. I thought I was dying. Anyway - we finally reached the house and were just about the last ones there. We arrived at 1 o'clock and the game started at 7. People were there since 8 am. Sorry, but I just cannot do that. We had our very own DJ and everything. BP in one corner, dancing in the center, and ice luges in the other corner. At one point, my friend ran up to me and said "this next song is for you!" as we were dancing. The next song came on, and what other song but "California Gurls" by Katy Perry right? She, along with others, started screaming and pointing at me until eventually all the people around us were staring at me confused. Then one, pretty intoxicated, kid said "hey aren't you from California?" Long story short, it was a good time. Pretty crazy, but super fun.

Now began the walk across the bridge and to the stadium. I was finally receiving the honor of being part of the "sea of red". As I looked around at all the ecstatic fans to reach their seats, I felt so at home away from home. It was awesome. We reached the gate we were entering and on it said "Through these gates pass the greatest fans in college football" and I didn't doubt that for a second. To anyone who is not a Husker fan that is reading this, I am not ragging on you at all! It is just a totally different feeling to be part of this camaraderie. 

We find great seats in the student section and get there just in time for the famous tunnel walk. The entire team walks together out of the locker room, down the red carpet, hits the lucky horse shoe, one senior holds the flag in front, and out of the gates they walk onto the field to the most excited crowd of people I've experienced. We love the team and they love us. As the team is running onto the field, and the crowd is emerging making the stadium the second largest city in Nebraska, I took a moment to take it all in and scan every inch of the stadium knowing I'd want to write about it later. No picture does it justice. There isn't anyone who is not smiling, cheering, jumping up and down, laughing, having a good time and not wearing red.

One thing about Nebraska, besides the entire state being fans , is that it is the classiest group of fans I have encountered. I know I am a Nebraska fan so it may seem biased, but that wasn't always the case. I have witnessed some poor sportsmanship from other teams - nothing beats Nebraska's welcoming, homey attitude even to the opponent. 

It is extremely hard to put into words this experience, it is really something you have to try for yourself. If I were you, I'd add "go to a Husker football game" to your bucket list. Oh…and Go Big Red.

CLUSTER OF KNOWLEDGE 

When life is boring write your own story.
     Journalism. What is journalism? < Rhetoric. Life. What is life? < Repetition.
     I don't know if I could call it an epiphany, but I definitely had some sort of new insight on the reality of the power of words after my first ever college class. The first thing my teacher says to us, for my rhetoric argumentative writing class, is "Do not write me something you think I'll give you an A for, just f***ing write what you think should be heard. I'm divorced, if he couldn't make me happy neither can you. Oh - and if profanity isn't your thing, this isn't the class for you." At this point I was not exactly sure what to think. I was definitely cracking up because it just seemed so ridiculous to hear a teacher saying these things, but at the same time I began to really respect her from that moment on. Finally a teacher who is genuine.
     Words can go so many different directions. Words can be the best gift you could ever possibly give or receive. Or words can be used as a weapon, they can feel more painful than physically being jabbed. This makes journalism such a diverse and fun major. This lesson makes journalism feel more important to me than people put it out to be. Although I am specifically planning on sports journalism, this first class made me want to change the world through language. As crazy as that sounds, words are more powerful than we give them credit for.
     Grouping words together in writing, speaking, song, etc. is a cluster of knowledge. My next journalism-related class, Principles of Mass Media, made me so excited to become an artist through writing. Some people paint, others write/play music, I write. We dissected a story and my professor continuously pointed out certain writing techniques that most English teachers would tell you to not do.
     Like writing one sentence paragraphs.
     And starting sentences with "and". But these things make writing unique. Fun. (Oh, and one word sentences aren't allowed either). Oops.
    I guess my point of this whole thing is to share my thoughts on the capability and influence of words. It is so exhillerating to get ideas across through the clustering of letters into words of your choosing to paint a portrait of your thoughts for everyone to see. The words you choose are your colors, the style of writing is your type of paint. To you, this may seem like a cluster of a bunch of pointless words and an irrelevant opinion that does not make sense, but to me it's my most recent masterpiece.

RUSH WEEK 

Day 1: First, in walks our rho gam (basically our tour guide) and gives us a bag full of a water bottle, granola bar, and a T Shirt. She tells us to fill the water bottle and eat because it's going to be a long day and put on the T Shirt. Walking in the door with all those girls chanting at you, staring at you, and grabbing you to start a conversation - is like nothing else I've ever experienced. It was definitely an overwhelming, tiring day. But I was stoked to be able to see all the houses and try and imagine which one I fit in best with!

Day 2: Most tired I've been in a while. Went to ten houses today in 90 degree weather with 85% humidity. Talked to about 20 different girls for 15 minutes talking about all of the same things. Oh and did I forget to mention the fact that all the frat guys sit on their lawns with a mega phone and when an attractive girl walks by, they make the siren go off then yell a number in which signifies their hotness rating. And the question "why the heck did you move from California to here" is basically the topic of every conversation. But after i tell them why, they smile and say "ya makes sense, Lincoln is cool".

Day 3: This day was better. A lot less hectic because there were less girls involved in each house. But it started off pretty nerve wracking. You have to go to your rho gam and receive your schedule for the day hoping that you got invited back to all your top rated houses. I was very happy with my schedule for the day! But a lot of girls weren't so happy, which was tough. Today was about learning what each house did for philanthropy purposes. It was cool to see what they are involved in and allowed us to look at them in a different perspective. Now we have to cut these top 10 into top 6 for day 41 that's gonna be hard.

Day 4: Today is a little less stressful and chaotic again yet we are all a little more tired. It's house tour day! I was invited back to tour 6 houses, the max you could tour, and had a hard decision to make that night. All the houses are super gorgeous and hard to turn down. But I narrowed it down to a top 3!

Day 5:  This day was stressful. This day was fun. This day was emotional. It made the decision hard. We went to as many houses as we got asked back to, max three. They talked to us again, gave us nice little treats to eat, the house mom spoke, and of course they sang to us. All three houses made it very hard to not like them. It was up to us to just let the ceremonies happen and dig deep down to see which one we felt most at home in. I found my home, but they have to choose me as well on bid day! 

BID DAY: Most insane day ever. We all walked to the student union and met with our Rho Gam who had our destination lying within them. She handed them out to each of us with our name on them. The countdown started…once it got to 1 everyone was screaming because they found out who they got into while I was struggling to open mine. Finally! I ran to my new home, received the house T shirt, then we all ran to the house. This was absolutely outrageous. Everyone lined the sidewalks and cheered us on, I felt like a celebrity. I sprinted as fast as possible and almost passed out right on the lawn of my new home at Delta Gamma. Every house is awesome in their own way, but I am so happy I am in the one I thought I fit in with best!! 

GOODBYES

      They say "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened" but I think it is okay to do both.

Goodbyes are never easy. And while some are harder than others, none of them are fun. To say goodbye to someone you know you will see again and everything between you will be the same no matter what, is sad but it makes it easier knowing it isn't forever. With others, you may be pretty confident in staying in touch and seeing again and acting the same but maybe not 100% sure - those are tough.

When you say goodbye to someone you have grown so close to that you forget what it's like without them there, it is obviously going to be difficult. You may not still keep in touch and even if you do, it may never be the same again. With this type of goodbye, you really never know what could happen!! This really makes the transition challenging. College is supposed to be an exciting, irreplaceable experience! And although it is, it may be heavy in the beginning because of things like goodbyes. 

But as we are sad about leaving our family and friends at home, it is the time of our lives to create new friendships without forgetting or letting go of the old. It is the time for us to experience something completely new. It is our time to focus on us.  So while I know it is painful to let go and to say goodbye, smile through it. It is okay to be sad, but do not let it ruin one day of this new adventure!

Tomorrow I leave from the home I grew up in since I was 3 years old at 5:30am. And while I say "see you later" to my mom, dad, brother, dog, and any special inanimate objects around the house with a tear, I am overfilled with joy and excitement to discover what is in store for me & my friends as we flip the page to the next chapter of our lives. 

Just remember; if a goodbye is hard, that simply means you were very lucky to have had something so hard to say goodbye to. 

Next up: move in day!

NATION SWITCH
     This blog is going to tell my story of the transition into a big college kid and everything that goes along with that. I started this with the thought in mind that many of you could relate to this impactful change. Whether it be in your past, your future, or the present - many of you can associate to what I am feeling. I am moving from Southern California, AKA my favorite place in the entire world, to Lincoln, Nebraska. The title "Nation Switch" refers to moving from surf nation (Southern California) to husker nation (Lincoln, Nebraska). Enjoy!
     The switch from Surf Nation to Husker Nation (GO BIG RED) begins in 7 days. What that means for me is huge because of my love for this beautiful state I grew up in. Let me start by listing a few of my favorite things: sand, surf, ocean, sun and my family. Now let me list the things from that list that will be at my new home: occasional sun. So now you see my problem.
      As excited as I am to start this new chapter of my life, I am also feeling every other emotion you could think of. Now, if you are from or have visited California, then you could easily relate to what I will miss. If you are not from here and have never had the blessing of experiencing it...I am truly sorry for you because my oh my are you missing out. 
      Now with that said, I am super excited to live somewhere different and to try out a new lifestyle for a while and  am confident that Nebraska will satisfy me as my home during college!! I am just going to miss California dearly while I am there. But I have heard nothing but great things about the city of Lincoln and the spirit of the school! I cannot wait to experience my first Big Red football game along with everything else Big Red!
     The anticipation is definitely the hardest part. Except what comes next: the goodbyes.